Write Thinking

Perspectives from a writer & life coach indulging her desire to intersect those two passions

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Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, United States

I am a practicing life coach who is currently writing a life coaching column called Game Plan for Foxbusiness.com: http://nancola.com/pages/press.html. I am also working on a book about the power and magic of life coaching.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Mommy dearests

Well, if ever I've been riveted to an article, it was this week's New York magazine cover story called "The Mommy Diaries." I mean, whoa. Apparently there's this UrbanBaby website that is totally anonymous and all of these mothers post their "truth."

They illustrate the story with photos of women with babies and little cartoon bubbles with their "thoughts" such as:

I know my husband is cheating on me.

I never wanted this baby.

I guess I just wanted to get married and have a baby, but I'm starting to look at everyone else and think they're happier than me.

Well, duh. When 10 friends all graduate college together and then get married within two years of each other, surely math tells us that a few of them just married because they felt it was "time." This happens all the time. I live in a town where the median age is about 32. It's filled with upwardly mobile people who couple and start families. I hear people talking about going to four weddings in a year. How is it possible that those are all well thought-out marriages? What they are is well thought-out weddings.

But back to this article. These women are coming clean on their income levels, how pissed they are that their husbands don't get up for feedings, how sexless their marriages are. The stay-at-homes duel with the work-outside-the-homes. Goodness gracious.

Perhaps the most riveting part of all is where the writer of the article draws parallels between these women and the 1950s mothers that Betty Friedan wrote about in The Feminine Mystique. She cites, among other things, a nervous breakdown over not being able to breast feed, desperation for marriage and "taking tranquilizers like cough drops." Yes, sadly, that does sound familiar in 2006.

How fortunate I feel to have made decisions in my own life that I don't regret. Whew.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am a wife, very much in love with her husband, and a mommy of two...
Perhaps the real problem started with the reason they wanted to get married. I have watched thousands of women plan weddings. I truly believe the desire for the wedding or 6 hours of fame is the root of the exisiting problem. It seems like weddings are like fast food chains popping up everywhere... quickly solving a hunger or need, however not very healthy. Very often the end result is "The Mommy Diaries." Ladies what are we doing? Freaky.

2:09 PM  

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